Part 1 - Meet Jack Collins

Our story begins...


EXT. SUBURBAN DRIVEWAY – DUSK. (Period)
A quiet suburban street in 1978. As the sun is setting we see the silhouette of all the identical roof lines against the indigo sky. We see two headlights approach in the gathering darkness. The passenger headlight flickers twice, then goes out altogether.

The car slows and pulls into the driveway of a non-descript split level home. The 1971 Parisienne stops and the engine is turned off. The engine knocks and rattles for a few more seconds.
We see the driver, a man in his early forties, lean forward and rest his head on the steering wheel. This is Mike Collins: an entrepreneur with nothing but a string of failed business and bad credit on his resume.


After a moment, Mike gets out of the car and slams the door. He takes a step, then stops, shoulders slumping.

JACK (VOICE OVER)

That’s my Dad, back in ’78.

Mike turns, walks back to the car, opens the door and pulls out his briefcase. He shuts the door again, but we hear the unmistakable sound of an uncaught latch. We see the interior light is on, guaranteeing a dead battery in the morning.

JACK (V.O.)

I was seven and didn’t have a clue

what he did for a living.

At the front window, we see the curtains pulled aside and a seven year old boy looking out. This is young JACK COLLINS, our story’s narrator.

JACK (V.O.)

That’s me in the window. Pretty cute

huh?

Mike walks to the front door, and waves to Jack. He is distracted and trips over a bike with a banana seat and baseball cards in the spokes.

JACK (V.O.)

Dad was kind of a goof too, even for

the seventies. But when I was a kid,

I couldn’t wait for him to come home.

INT. COLLINS FAMILY HOME – NIGHT. (Period)
The front door opens. Mike enters, puts down his briefcase and hangs his coat in the closet. It falls off the hanger in a heap. He walks heavily to the kitchen, looking ten years older than his 42 years.

Young Jack EXPLODES into the front hall and rushes to grab Mike.

YOUNG JACK

Dad! Dad! Can you play catch?

MIKE

Hey Little Buddy. Give Dad a few

minutes. Go watch some TV huh?

Young Jack walks slowly back to stand in the living room doorway, crestfallen.

Through the kitchen door we see Allison Collins preparing supper. Mike kisses her neck, but she does not stop mashing potatoes to greet him. We see them talking but cannot hear the words. Their conversation is animated and tense, with Mike using his hands rapidly.

JACK (V.O.)

It was usually like that. Dad had big

plans of getting rich, moving me and

Mom into a big house. Mom just wanted

him to take a job with her father’s

mattress business “Sleepeeze” – the third

largest mattress chain in the tri-state area.

CUT TO:

INTERSTITIAL - STILL PICTURE
We see a newspaper add for “Sleepeeze” showing a graying man in a nightshirt standing next to a bed in a field surrounded by sheep.

INT. COLLINS FAMILY HOME – NIGHT. (Period)
Young Jack is still standing in the doorway watching his parents fight in the kitchen.

JACK (V.O.)

But no matter how hard Dad tried, he

could never get anything to turn a profit.

All he ever got from going out on a limb

was crashing to earth again and again.

Mike leaves the kitchen and walks toward Young Jack. He puts his arm around the boy and leads him into the living room. Young Jack turns on the set and starts turning the knob. Mike has opened the liquor cabinet and is pouring bourbon over ice. He sits on the couch as the channels FLASH by: All in the Family, M*A*S*H, Happy Days.

The next CLICK of the dial shows the opening of Dr. No where the three blind men gun down Agent Strangway in a Jamaican street.

MIKE

Stop!

The glow of the TV washes over the two figures as the 007 theme MUSIC begins to play. Slowly, Young Jack backs up the couch and sits next to his father. Mike puts his arm around his son.
The camera pulls around and we see on the TV the first time Bond introduces himself at the casino table.

BOND (ON TV)

Bond. James Bond.

The camera pulls back over the shoulders of father and son engaged in a common pursuit. In the background, we see Allison throwing clothes into a suitcase, suggesting she is moving out.

FADE OUT.

OPENING CREDITS - Black screen.
We hear the voice-overs of best known lines from some of cinema’s classic Guy Movies:

JAMES BOND (V.O.)

“That's a Smith and Wesson. You've had your six." (Dr. No)

Reveal Title on Screen:
THE GUY MOVIE GUIDE

MICHAEL COREONE (V.O.)
"Never take sides against the family." (The Godfather)

Reveal Title on Screen:
TO BUSINESS SUCCESS

TUCO (V.O.)
"When you have to shoot, shoot. Don't talk." (The Good, the Bad and the Ugly)

Reveal Title on Screen:
"How I Learned to Get Ahead at the Cineplex"

THE TERMINATOR (V.O.)
“Hasta La Vista Baby” (Terminator)

CUT TO:

INT. CLUTTERED TV ROOM – NIGHT.
Multiple 360 degree rotation around room as production credits roll.

We see movie posters on the wall (The Great Escape, One Flew over the Cuckoo’s Nest, Die Hard, Animal House). Stacks of VHS and DVD cases line the walls, cover the coffee table etc. This is the den of JACK COLLINS.

Each time the camera passes across the TV screen we see a clip of a different film: James Bond introducing himself, Duval’s napalm speech and finally Rocky calling “Adrian!”.

As the credits end, the TV goes SNOWY.

FADE TO BLACK.

EXT. BUSY STREET - DAY.
We see present day Jack Collins driving a beat up AMC Pacer. He has grown to be an average looking man in his early thirties wearing a short sleeve dress shirt and tie. He is trying to drive fast but has to hit the breaks frequently as the car in front slows. Each time he checks over his shoulder, but stays in the curb lane even though there is plenty of room to change lanes. An elderly woman on a bicycle passes him on the left.

Cautiously, Jack moves to the left lane and prepares to turn left onto a side street. He stops and signals left, but is unable to find a gap in the oncoming cars large enough for him to turn. Behind him, a line of cars begins to build. It is only when an absurdly long gap appears that Jack turns left, leaving behind a line of honking commuters.

EXT. RESIDENTIAL STREET - DAY.
We see Jack drive down a residential street of comfortable 1930’s houses with neat gardens; these are homes where your grandparents might live.

He pulls up to the curb in where a similarly dressed, stout man is standing. This is WARREN OSKY, Jack’s best friend. He still lives with his mother. Behind him the house has a wide porch and a flower garden full of geraniums, irises and gardenias. Warren opens the car door and struggles to get in.

INT. CAR – DAY.

WARREN

Nice of you to show up.

JACK

Sorry. Traffic.

WARREN

Yeah. It sucks when you’re

not the only car on the road.

Warren removes his attaché from his shoulder and reveals a skateboard he had slung over his back.

WARREN (CONT'D)

Check it out. Guess what we’re

doing after work?

JACK

Where’d you get that?

WARREN

Garage sale. It was a good deal too.

The kid will be in a cast for the rest

of the summer. His mom even threw

in the helmet and pads too. Never

been used.

Over Warren’s shoulder we see a woman in her seventies, wearing a house coat coming down the steps of the house. This is MRS. OSKY. She is holding a very wrinkled brown bag. She waves at the car frantically as she approaches.

Warren rolls down the window.

MRS. OSKY

Warren, you forgot the lunch I packed.

Nice to see you Jack.

JACK

Hi Mrs. Osky.

(beat)

Your flowers look nice.

MRS. OSKY

Thank you Jack. I do what I can,

but somebody is supposed to be

weeding.

She pokes Warren in the shoulder with a bony finger.

MRS. OSKY (CONT'D)

But I can only ask so many times.

Warren takes the bag through the window.

WARREN

Let me know when you reach that

point Mom. Thanks for the lunch.

Warren rolls the window up and stares straight ahead expecting to drive off. Mrs. Osky just stands at the curb. Jack has his hands on the wheel at 10 and 2, signals, shoulder checks but does not move.

WARREN

Are we not going to work today?

JACK

Seatbelt.

Jack points to Warren’s empty seat belt buckle.

WARREN

Fuck.

Warren struggles to pull it across his rather large frame.

WARREN (CONT'D)

You know I could have put this

on while we drove.

Jack repeats his methodical approach for entering traffic and pulls out.

JACK

But you wouldn’t. I’d get all the

way to the office without you

strapping yourself in.

Warren grabs the wheel and gives it a little jiggle. Jack tightens his death grip.

JACK

Quit it! Do you want to kill us both?

Warren struggles against the seatbelt for a moment then, he opens the bag to examine what his mother packed. He pulls out a carrot and three loose Triscuit crackers.

WARREN

For this she thinks she needs a

whole bag?

JACK

Isn’t that the same lunch bag

you’ve had for four years?

WARREN

Longer. I think it might have

been my Dad’s.

They drive in silence for a few moments. Warren fiddles with the radio but settles on the station they were originally listening to.

WARREN

So why were you late? Danielle not

let you out of the handcuffs?

JACK

(shocked)

What? No, she doesn’t -- I mean,

we don’t...
(beat)
No, Funny Guy. She stayed at her

own place last night.

WARREN

So that’s why you’re cranky. Just

as well. Big day today. Please tell

me you were directing all that sexual

tension into preparing for the meeting

today?

JACK

Not answering that.

WARREN

If you get to head this development,

bring this project in on time and you'll

get your own department. We all benefit.

JACK

Who says I want to run my own department?

WARREN

Hello? Remember our five year plan?

First we get the chicks who dig

programmers...

JACK

Oh sure. The Financial Software Groupies.

WARREN

Then our noble pursuit of money and

power. What happened to those goals

Man?

JACK

Impetuous youth. That’s what we were.

WARREN

You got scared.

JACK

What?

WARREN

Every time there was a risk to take

where the payoff might be a promotion,

or a raise, or even some crappy plaque

with your name on it, you backed off.
(beat)
But this time is it. This is the big payoff,

and I’m not going to let you blow it, if I

have to drag your unconscious body

across the finish line myself. You deserve

this one Jack.

For a moment, Jack allows himself to imagine something good happening, something he might deserve, until the possibility of failure shakes him back to reality.

WARREN (CONT’D)

Were you watching something go get

pumped up?

JACK

The Right Stuff. I find it very inspiring.

All Yeager needed to break the sound

barrier with a broken shoulder was an

old broom handle and a stick of Beeman’s.

WARREN

(nodding)

Great American hero.

JACK

You said it. Who better to present the

project proposal to Mr. Ryan and the

Investment Review Committee today?

WARREN

Except it’s you that has to do it, not Yeager.

And that’s Movie Yeager you’re talking

about, Sam Sheppard with all the right editing

and lighting. Where’s your script? Where’s your

crane shot and slow motion entry?

EXT. DOWNTOWN STREET – DAY.
We see Jack's Pacer driving downtown. The traffic is moderate between rows of glass skyscrapers.

INT. CAR – DAY.

WARREN

You need to start making the distinction

between the movies and real life Jack. You

did the work on this project, not Bettman.

The only thing you’ve needed to do was

stand up, take a chance. Just like your

movie heroes: Bond, Bullitt, Die Hard.

Those guys weren’t afraid to risk something

to get it done.

JACK

I know. -- They all just make it look so -- easy.

They pull into the parkade of a generic office tower in the heart of the city’s downtown.
This is the office of Genuine Logic, the software development firm where Jack has worked for 8 years since getting his degree.

JACK (CONT'D)

Everything works out in the end, without

any downside.

EXT. PARKADE – DAY.
They exit the car, pull on their jackets and each man slings his laptop case over his shoulder. The two men walk across the parking lot to the elevator doors. Warren puts his hand on Jack’s shoulder.

WARREN

Don’t be afraid of the downside Jack.

It’s not as bad as you think. -- Many

of us even enjoy it.

JACK

Don’t you mean the Dark Side?

WARREN

(covering his mouth and breathing like Darth Vader)

I’m not your father Luke. I only

dated your mother in college.

They enter the elevator and the doors close.