Part 6 - Houston, We Have a Problem

(Please read the previous episodes before reading this posting)
Part 1 - Meet Jack Collins
Part 2 - Jack Would Rather Be in the Coffin Than Giving the Eulogy
Part 3 - Danielle's Ultimatum
Part 4 - Mr. Bond's Great Escape
Part 5 - Stanely Discovers a Half Naked Livingston

Jack returns to work but can he manage his stress with all the changes around him?

INT. GENUINE LOGIC OFFICE - DAY.
Jack and Warren walk through the front doors. It is early so there are not many employees in yet. However, Bryan is waiting in the bullpen.

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BRYAN

Nice of you to make it in, Jack.

.

JACK

I’m sorry, I was in hospital.

.

Bryan takes step back.

.

BRYAN

You don’t look very sick to me. What’s
wrong?

.

WARREN

False alarm. Thought it was bird flu, but
since Jack hasn’t been having sex with
birds for a while, it’s likely just fatigue
from overwork.

.

Jack and Warren move past him to their desks. Bryan hurries along behind.

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BRYAN

You’re really sick Osky, you know that?

.

WARREN

Possibly, but I still came into work didn’t
I?

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BRYAN

Look Jack. We got the go ahead for the
FuBaste but...

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WARREN

Let me guess -- with you as project
manager?

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BRYAN

Yes, but...

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JACK

Even though you had nothing to do with the
concept.

.

Jack drops his attaché on his desk in disgust.

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BRYAN
Yes, but... the Committee wants a full
development projection by Friday. That’s
tomorrow.

.

JACK

Give me a break. The Steering Committee

are all the same people we presented to two

days ago.

.

WARREN

Just with different titles.

.

BRYAN

What can i tell you? That's the way it is.

There are too many other projects waiting

to go ahead.
(pause)
If you want this project to happen Jack,
this is the only way.

.

JACK

I have the milestones, but there are too
many other dependencies to give an accurate
forecast. It’ll take a couple of weeks...

.

BRYAN

There isn’t time.

.

JACK

Plus some of the resources are tied up in
existing projects...

.

BRYAN

I said there isn’t time. Look, I know you
wanted to run this, but unless we do it
this way, my way, and now, it’s done.

.

JACK

Okay...I’ll get the team together this
morning.

.

BRYAN

Thanks.

.

Bryan heads off to bother someone else.

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WARREN

Don’t let him push you around like that.

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JACK

But what choice do I have? At least this
way I’ll get some of the credit. Otherwise
I’ll get stuck working on someone else’s
crummy project, fixing their screw-ups.

.

Jack sits and boots his computer. Warren shakes his head and walks to his desk. Jack’s phone RINGS.

.

JACK

Jack Collins -- Hi Dee. Yeah, it was great.
You? Good.
(whispers into the phone)
Sorry I had to leave before you got up.

.

Bryan appears behind him, impatiently taps his watch and walks off.

.

JACK (CONT’D)

Listen I’m swamped, can I call you later?
(beat)
Is that tonight? -- No, I do want to go to
your brother’s for dinner, I like him. --
Sure I do, we have plenty in common.
(beat)
Okay. I’ll pick up some barbeque stuff
after work and meet you there. – Okay, bye.

.

Jack hangs up. Warren pops his head over the cubicle.

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WARREN

Going to Steel’s tonight?

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JACK
(unenthusiastically)

Yeah.

.

We see Jack is booking people for a meeting through his computer.

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WARREN

Better brush up on your golfing trivia.

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JACK

Don’t remind me.

.

Jack and Warren walk off towards a meeting room where four other employees from different parts of the office are converging. They all enter the darkened room.

.

INT. DANIELLE’S OFFICE – DAY
Danielle is having coffee with Susan Mowat, another lawyer in her firm.

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DANIELLE

I just don’t know what’s gotten into him.
He’s never behaved anything like this.

.

SUSAN

Classic.

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DANIELLE

What do you mean?

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SUSAN

It’s just classic male underachiever
behavior, reacting to a successful woman
taking control.

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DANIELLE

I don’t think it’s like that.

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SUSAN

Face it Danielle. He has no power at work,
and now you’re calling the shots at home.
Frankly, I’ve never understood your
relationship.

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DANIELLE

I suppose you’re going to tell me whether I
ask why or not.

.

SUSAN

Look at you. You’re beautiful, he’s kind
of, oh I don’t know...

.

DANIELLE

Cute?

.

SUSAN

I was thinking 'shrubby'.

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DANIELLE

Oh.

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SUSAN

You could do better. You’re the youngest
women to make partner in the firm’s
history...

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DANIELLE

Second youngest.

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SUSAN

Whatever. Jack’s the oldest programmer at
his company and most of his managers are
younger that him.

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DANIELLE

His professional life and our personal
lives are two separate things. -- Besides
you can’t measure success by position or
income alone.

.

Just then, a handsome man in his mid thirties pops his head in the door. He is wearing a $2000 Armani suit and his hair is freshly cut. This is DOUG CRANE, partner and head of the Acquisitions division of the firm.

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DOUG

Danielle? Herb and Barry would like to see
you in the boardroom in a few. Thanks.

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DANIELLE

Oh, sure.

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DOUG

Fabulous. Hi Susan. Great shoes.

.

With a wink and a grin, Doug is gone.

.

SUSAN

Good thing you can’t measure success by
income and position. Otherwise poor Doug
would never have a chance against Jack.

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DANIELLE

Oh shut up. Now get out. I have to see what
the senior partners want.

.

Danielle packs up her portfolio and heads down the hall.

.

INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY
Five GL employees, including Warren, are sitting around a long table. Jack is standing. The meeting has been going on for some time. The table is littered with coffee cups, notepaper, much of it crumpled.

On the wall are POST-IT NOTES with scribbling and the WHITE BOARD is covered with boxes, arrows and labels.

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JACK

No, we can’t keep the development time that
long. Something has to be cut. This has to
be an early launch to the market.

.

STEVE

Without the requirements better defined…

JACK

They’re as well defined as anything else
this company has done.

.

STEVE

Not for something this size.

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RAJIV

You can’t just expect this type of project
to happen without better direction.

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JACK

Is that a dig at me?

.

Jack is frustrated and the conflict potential is increasing.

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RAJIV

No, Jack. But any analysis of the business
objects will take three iterations with the
requirements we have now.

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JACK

There isn’t time for three iterations.

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MARGARET

And then there’s the database platform
review.

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WARREN

They’re right Jack. It can’t be done to
Bettman’s timelines.

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JACK

It has to be.

.

Jack throws down his fistful of notes. His mouth is dry from anxiety, but all the water bottles are empty.

.

MARGARET

Look. It’s not your project anymore. Why do
you care so much?

.

JACK

Because -- I want to be on a winning team.
Success is good for all of us on this, no
matter who’s in charge.

.

Jack is sweating; he loosens his tie. Heads are being shaken around the table.

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STEVE

I’m not in this for the glory.

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MARGARET

Me neither.

.

Jack is losing them.

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JACK

It’s not about glory...

.

Jack braces against the table top to catch his breath.

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RAJIV

It just can’t be done Jack. Not the way the
system was designed.
(beat)
Jack? -- Are you all right?

CUT TO:

APOLLO 13 – CLIP
Gene Kranz (Ed Harris) compelling Houston Mission Control to bring back the astronauts safely.

.

KRANZ

I don't care what anything was designed to
do. I care about what it can do.

CUT TO:

INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY

JACK (AS KRANZ)

I don't care what anything was designed to
do. I care about what it can do.

.

The group looks around at each other in confusion.

.

WARREN

You don’t look so good. Maybe you should
sit down.

.

JACK (AS KRANZ)

So let's get to work. Let's lay it out,
okay?

.

There is grudging assent as RAJIV and MARGARET return to their notes.

.

WARREN

We might trim some time if we use the old
query tool code.

.

STEVE

No. That’s like putting a putting a square
peg in a round hole.

CUT TO:

APOLLO 13 - CLIP
The flight engineers are trying to figure out how to fix the CO2 scrubbers with just duct tape and hoses.

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KRANZ

What about the scrubbers on the command
module?

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ENGINEER 1

They take square cartridges.

.

ENGINEER 2

And the ones on the LEM are round.

.

KRANZ

Well, I suggest you gentlemen invent a way
to put a square peg in a round hole.
Rapidly.

CUT TO:

INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY

JACK (AS KRANZ)

Well, I suggest you gentlemen invent a way
to put a square peg in a round hole.
Rapidly.

.

Rajiv, Margaret and Warren stop their renewed work effort to watch the confrontation.

.

JACK (AS KRANZ)

The people upstairs have handed us this
one, and we gotta come through -- we gotta
find a way to make this...

.

Jack mimes he is holding the square air filter.

.

JACK (AS KRANZ)

Fit into the hole for this...

.

Jack mimes he is holding the round air filter. The team members look at each other in embarrassed confusion, not understanding why Jack is pointing and gesturing at thin air.

.

JACK (AS KRANZ)

Usin' nothin' but that.

.

Jack points to the imaginary mound of equipment on the table.

.

JACK (AS KRANZ)

So make it happen.

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Jack CLAPS his hands once.

.

Steve gets up and starts to walk to the door.

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STEVE

You must be out of your mind.

.

Jack clenches his fists at his side and steps between Steve and the door. The insubordination is too much for his fragile psyche. Warren can only watch in stunned silence.

CUT TO:

DIRTY HARRY - CLIP
Harry Callahan (Clint Eastwood) is engaged in a standoff with a gunman.

.

CALLAHAN

I know what you're thinking. Did he fire
six shots or only five? Well, to tell you
the truth, in all this excitement, I've
kinda lost track myself. But being as
this is a .44 Magnum, the most powerful
handgun in the world, and would blow your
head clean off,

CUT TO:

INT. MEETING ROOM – DAY

JACK (AS HARRY CALLAHAN)

You've got to ask yourself a question: Do I
feel lucky? Well, do ya, punk?

.

The door OPENS and Bryan enters enthusiastically.

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BRYAN

How’s my team coming along? Got some
estimates on the delivery?

.

Bryan’s entrance has ended the standoff. Steve backs down while Jack remains standing in a daze. Warren jumps up and puts an arm around Jack.

.

WARREN

Jack is keeping us focused. He’s a pro.

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BRYAN
(claps and rubs his hands)

Super. So we’ll have those timelines this
afternoon?

.

Jack does not answer.

.

STEVE

Yeah, I guess we can give you something.

.

Steve turns and begins to erase the whiteboard while sketching out something else.

.

WARREN

I think me and the Big Guy are just

going to grab some air. You know, with

all this high octane thinking going on...

.

Warren leads the zombie-like Jack from the room.

Part 5 - Stanley Discovers a Half Naked Livingston

(Please read the previous episodes before reading this posting)
Part 1 - Meet Jack Collins
Part 2 - Jack Would Rather Be in the Coffin Than Giving the Eulogy
Part 3 - Danielle's Ultimatum
Part 4 - Mr. Bond's Great Escape

Warren finds Jack safe in his apartment but jack remembers nothing of his bold escape.

INT. JACK’S APARTMENT - NIGHT.
The setting sun can just be seen through the blinds. The apartment is quiet, except for the TICKING of a clock. We can see Jack lying face down on the floor, still in his hospital gown. His BACK is slowly rising and falling, so we know he is still alive.

.

The phone RINGS three times and the machine picks up.

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VOICE OF DIRTY HARRY

Go ahead, make my day...

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VOICE OF JACK

and leave me a message. BEEP.

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VOICE OF DANIELLE
(she is frantic)

Jack? Jack? Are you there? Please pick up.
We’re all looking for you, Warren, his mom.
-- We’re all worried.

.

Danielle is on the edge of tears as her VOICE CHOKES.

.

VOICE OF DANIELLE (CONT’D)

Call me, please. -- Make my day.

.

Her SLIGHT SOBS can be heard as she hangs up.The phone call has woken Jack. He starts to stir, slowly pushing himself up on his elbows, then on all fours. Sitting back on his heels, he holds his head and groans. Jack looks down and sees he is wearing a hospital gown. He looks around the apartment completely stunned at what could have happened to him, or worse, what had he done.

.

There is POUNDING at the door.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

Jack!? Buddy? You home?

.

He POUNDS three more times.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

It’s Warren. Can you open the door?

.

We can hear someone else has come into the hallway.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

Oh, hey, hey Ma’am? Excuse me. Do you know
if Jack Collins is home? -- The man who
lives here?

.

Pause. There are INAUDIBLE MURMURINGS from in the hallway. Jack has not moved.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

Then what the hell good are you? Stop
wasting my time.

.

We hear HIGH-PITCHED INDIGNATION.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

Oh nice, very ladylike. You touch your
grandkids with that finger?

.

Warren bangs on the door again.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)
(through the door)

Jack? Jack?

.

Jack struggles to his feet and walks to the door. It is unlocked. Jack has not left his apartment door unlocked in years.

.

JACK
(quizzically)

What the...?

.

He opens the door. Warren is standing there, arm raised about to pound on the door again.

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WARREN

Jack!!

.

Warren lunges forward and grabs Jack around the shoulders. He then bear hugs him lifting him off the ground, but in doing so has to drop his hands down Jack’s back. Warren hasn’t realized that Jack is wearing a hospital gown and in his eagerness at seeing his friend is now in direct and
unwelcome contact with Jack’s bare buttocks.

.

WARREN (CONT'D)
(with shock and disgust)

Whoa, man. What are you doing hanging
around without your gaunch on? That’s just
rude.

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JACK
(with great confusion)

I -- I just woke up. On the floor.

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WARREN

Oh I’ve been there, done that and I have
the t-shirt to prove it. Sounds like good
times.

.

Warren pushes past Jack into the apartment. He plops down on the couch as though he is on the edge of exhaustion, taking up twice the space a person needs.

.

JACK

No, I didn’t get hammered -- at least I
don’t think so. I can’t remember...

.

WARREN

Hey, I can’t blame you Buddy. You got any
crude stitching on your bod? Still have
both kidneys? Being in the hospital can be
traumatic. I would’ve been tempted to tie
one too. Speaking of which... you got any

cold one’s in the fridge?

.

Warren pushes himself off the couch and walks to the kitchen. Warren rummages around in the refrigerator looking for beer. Jack follows him into the kitchen.

.

JACK

When was I in the hospital?

.

WARREN

Today. Well, last night actually. You
checked yourself out this morning. That’s
why we’re out looking for you.

.

Warren emerges beerless from the refrigerator and closes the door.

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JACK

I don’t remember any of that at all. The
last thing I remember was boxing up all my
movie stuff -- then waking up here in this
stupid gown. -- Where are my clothes? And
why are my feet all dirty?

.

WARREN
(laughing)

Oh, that’s the best part.

.

Warren walks past Jack back into the living room. He starts to dial the phone on the table beside the couch.

.

WARREN

When I said you ‘checked yourself out’,
apparently it was more like you ‘busted
out’.

.

Jack just stands in the kitchen doorway unable to grasp what he’s being told.

.

WARREN (CONT'D)

You smoked the doctor over the head with
the meal tray and hustled out a back
stairway. Not even a goodbye to your
roommate. Mr. Steinburg says hello by the
way. We’re still trying to piece together
what happened after that, but there are
unconfirmed reports of a man on a stolen
Vespa wearing only a hospital gown riding
erratically through the downtown. Now I’m
no detective, but I do know two and two
make five. Any chance we’ll find a Vespa in
the apartment?

.

On the other end of the phone Danielle’s MACHINE picks up.

.

WARREN (CONT'D)
(into the phone)

Hi, Danielle. I’ve found him safe and sound
at home. But it looks like he’s lost his
sense of modesty. I’ll hang out here until
you come.

.

Warren hangs up.

.

WARREN (CONT’D)

Seriously Dude. I’ve been here five minutes
already and you’re still hanging your moon.
Put on some pants.

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JACK

Sorry.

.

Warren takes Jack’s shoulders and points him toward his bedroom.

.

WARREN

Don’t apologize. Just -- do something with
-- all that. Sanitize.

.

Jack turns. We follow him as he walks down the hall to his bedroom. He passes the den and stops. The room is bare of the movie paraphernalia, except for one remaining box he did not yet take down to the street. Jack shakes his head and goes into the bathroom and shuts the door.

.

CUT TO:

INT. DANIELLE’S CAR – NIGHT.
Danielle has been driving around looking for Jack. She dials into her cell phone and we hear WARREN’S MESSAGE over the speaker. Her eyes begin to tear up and immediately turns the car.

.

INT. JACK’S APARTMENT - NIGHT.
Jack emerges from his bedroom dressed and comes into the kitchen to find Warren cooking. He has been gone for no more that 10 minutes, but in this time Warren has managed to turn the kitchen into a war zone. He has used nearly every pot and pan. Steam is rising from a pot on the stove that has spaghetti noodles escaping over the top, sauce is spattered on the cupboards and for some reason there are scrambled eggs on the counter.

.

WARREN

Hey, there he is. Feel better?

.

Jack is horrified at the sight of his kitchen. Warren’s demolition is another is a series of events that have recently robbed him of any control.

.

JACK

What are you doing?

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WARREN

Supper. You gotta be hungry. I understand
you didn’t even get your pudding at the
hospital.

.

JACK

Yeah, but did you have to cook everything I
have?

.

WARREN

Hey, don’t tell me about how to eat.
(rubs his prodigious stomach)
I don’t tell you how to be crazy.

.

Warren hands Jack a heaping plate of spaghetti.

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JACK

I’ve never seen so much food on one plate
before.

.

Jack pulls up a forkful of spaghetti that contains olives, hotdog bits, pickles and other unrecognizable accessories.

.

JACK (CONT'D)

Or has contained so many ill suited
ingredients. -- Are you pregnant?

.

The door bursts open and Danielle rushes in.

.

DANIELLE

Jack!

.

Danielle rushes to Jack and grabs him, causing the pile of spaghetti to slip to the floor.

.

WARREN

Great. All that work wasted.

.

She continues to kiss him oblivious of the mess, or Warren.

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DANIELLE

Oh thank God, you’re all right. I was so
worried. Everyone was.

.

She continues to pepper his face with kisses.

.

DANIELLE (CONT'D)

Why did you leave the hospital?

.

JACK

I don’t know. I don’t remember even being
there.

.

DANIELLE

You don’t remember hitting the doctor?

.

JACK

Nope.

.

DANIELLE

Or running off in your gown?

.

JACK

No, but I do remember having my ass
grabbed in it by Warren.

.

WARREN

I think that’s my cue to leave.

.

Warren grabs his jacket from the counter and heads to the door.

.

JACK

Thanks for all your...help.

.

WARREN

Don’t mention it.

.

JACK

I’m sure just burning down the kitchen will
be the best way to clean it.

.

WARREN

Ungrateful friend. I don’t know why I
bother carpooling with you as a favor.

.

Warren closes the door behind him.

.

JACK
(sarcastically)

I can't understand why you don’t

like him.

.

DANIELLE

It escapes me, but I’m sure it will come
back. Now what do you say we check you out
and make sure there are no broken bones?

.

Danielle takes Jack by the hand and leads him down the hall to the bedroom.

.

JACK

Well, you can never be too careful.

.

DANIELLE

Yes. It’s the mature thing to do.

.

They close the bedroom door behind them.

FADE OUT.